My Psalm of What

I Thessalonians 5:23-24: "Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you entirely; and may your spirit and soul and body be preserved complete, without blame at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. Faithful is He who calls you, and He also will bring it to pass."

Dear Heavenly Father,

What is it that You are bringing about in my life? I do not know. And how many times have I thwarted Your desires for my life because of my sin? How many blessings have I denied myself because of my willfulness? What would my life look like if I didn't have this albatross hanging around my neck?

What is sad is that I will never know as long as I am on this earth. Maybe You will show me what Your plans for my life were had I not taken these detours. Maybe that is what a part of Judgement will be, that is, seeing all the blessings that might have been had I not bee so foolish. How could I not grieve my sins in light of seeing what Your perfect plan was for my life?

What I wonder is, in the end, will the outcome of my life still be the same? That despite my sin, despite the detours I have made, will I end up right where You have wanted me all along? Or, because I have stepped off the path You had for me, will my life story end differently than what You intended for me? Are there various options for the outcome of my life, all that will fit into Your plan for me despite my ignorance?

What I find is that You, O Lord, my God, are so amazing because You know the answers to these questions. I praise You for Your Almighty wisdom. I am humbled as I contemplate all these things. I long to know Your will for my life, and I pray for Your strength and wisdom. Lord God, I am grateful for Your promises, and that You will do as You say. I cling to You, Your grace, Your mercy, and ask You to forgive me. Forgive me for my willfulness and my pride. Forgive me for walking off-course in my foolishness. Have mercy on me, and lead me, be my Shepherd, because I am weak and do not know what is best for me.

In the Name of Jesus Christ,
My Lord and Savior, I pray,
Amen